Posted by Anonymous on 2013/02/24 under Uncategorized I went to a purity retreat with my youth group. As we all sat around a campfire, we wrote down a burden of ours and threw it into the fire, to symbolize us giving it to God. I wrote the only thing that came to mind: I feel like God screwed up when He made me because I feel trapped inside of my own body. My best friend saw that I was having problems throwing this issue into the fire, so she stayed out there with me. (She’s the only person who knows this, and I can’t even get the courage to tell my parents, even though she is telling me I need to tell them.) Ever since we had started to talk to each other, and ever since our friendship began developing into what it is now, I realized that I loved her. I really do want to spend the rest of my life with her. I didn’t tell her this at the campfire, but I eventually told her everything, including my feelings for her. She knows how I feel, yet she’s awesome enough to still be my best friend and hang out with me and everything. I know that I have absolutely no shot with her, because she wants a husband and kids of her own. All I want is for her to be happy, but I can’t help but feel sad when I think that eventually she will move away when her Prince Charming gets his head out of his ass and finally gives her the happily ever after she deserves. I know that if our friendship is strong enough, distance won’t matter, but I still worry that she’ll get so busy with her life and then I’ll get busy with mine and we’ll grow apart. I don’t want to feel this way, but I can’t just stop, you know?